My mom used to comment about how I couldn't sit still. I was an anxious Tasmanian devil, moving from one task to another: Yoga-errands-work-cleaning-lifing-dizzy-repeat.
Then I met Rob. I was so envious how he always remembered to take pause and look at the sky or smell the air or enjoy a moment. I was "too busy" for that...
On January 4th, when the Earth fell off its axis for that brief moment (and we lost our Mom), I understood what Rob was doing (better). He was breathing in the moments. The importance of taking time...take pause. All we have is now.
As we move through each season, there is a raw tenderness that follows. It's new. Mom isn't here. But we have to move through.
I have always found the beach to be a humbling place for me. I feel small next to the ocean. It's spiritual and grounding all at the same time. And so, about a month ago, I said to Rob "I NEED ocean".
Rob, Kate and I booked an Air BNB for a few days last week. Every time I go to the beach, I leave buying a lottery ticket with the grand plan "if I win", I will buy a beach house- ha! I will keep you all posted. It was a much needed break from the daily grind. We ate oysters and bbq, we assembled puzzles and read. We turned off our brains for a few days and reset. Just breathe.
Back in Charlotte...
Labor Day weekend was relaxed and low-key for the family. We had friends over for game night and I made a huge batch of homemade egg noodles! Nothing beats the taste of homemade pasta...trust me!
Kate and I also kept up with one of our favorite family traditions, Matthews Alive. We love checking out art, tasting honey and buying a few gifts to wrap up for Christmas. One of my favorite vendors was a honey company that had crazy amazing flavors such as ginger and chai. Kate bought the elderberry-infused honey to pair with her evening tea.
I'm learning (aren't we all)...but what I am learning a lot about is that life is a game and it's all a matter of how you want to play. It doesn't make sense to try and force a thousand errands into a small time capsule. And it doesn't make sense to get stressed over spilled milk. I've been handed an unusual hand: Mom passes- become insta-parent- newlywed- maintain some sort of normal (whatever the F that means these days)... and I easily get overwhelmed. But I hear my Mom whisper from someplace in the universe to spend time in nature because the deer and squirrels aren't worrying about a 401k.
Take pause. Heal. Repeat.